Carol Anne Costa: Trumptacular!

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Carol Ann Costa GoLocalProv MINDSETTER

Trumpet: noun- trum·pet \ˈtrəm-pət\ to proclaim widely or loudly. For example, "the candidate trumpeted a campaign strategy of slash and burn.” Or, “The politician trumpeted an accomplishment of his or her leadership.” Ahh, the Trumps and trumpets of June; can you hear them? In Rhode Island you have to listen very carefully, as the usual loud proclamations, bluster, and wailing seeping out from the Smith Street marble halls were muted and substituted with a cool hum of collaboration and harmony. Sounds like democracy, NOT. The June budget fights have been replaced with a Woodstock, flower child feel under the traditionally hot and raucous dome. I have not heard a better version of Michael Row the Boat Ashore in quite a while. But, it makes for boring Capital TV and begs the question; Joe Trillo, where for art thou? No one is picking your pockets this year? And, a big thanks to Patricia Morgan the GOP’s very own Brienne of Tarth, standing tall, ready for the fight that sadly never came. Let’s hope they have one good fight left in 2015, for posterity.

Luckily the Kumbyahs in Lil Rhody were substituted with the Trumpacular announcement for President by ’The Donald.” For the love of the comb over, was this thing fantastic or what? Did you see it? Take 8 minutes it’s a keeper. Sweating dogs (FYI, dogs don’t sweat, they pant), ethnic slurs, chest puffing and bravado like no other, The Donald just made the GOP Presidential primary a freakin’ cage match. And, in true Trump fashion we will all want and pony up for the Pay Per View. That’s probably why he is “really rich.”

How can you beat this as a rollout line, “The American dream is dead, and, I will bring it back, bigger and better than ever”? Akin to the image Dr. Frankenstein leaning over the hulkish corpse; lightning bolts and electricity pulsing feverishly in an attempt to raise the creature from the slab, Trump is leaning in to do the same for the economy, in his unique and Trumptastic way. “It’s alive, its’ alive.” It’s his vision and he’s sticking to it, far be it from me to criticize. After all, I don’t have towers, planes, golf courses, clothing lines, pageants, TV shows or 9 billion dollars. He is in it to spin it, and boy oh boy will he ever! Attention GOP flyers, buckle your seatbelts you are in for some Trumpturbulence.

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Trumpaction ...

Better known as Trump’s policy initiatives, the Donald has some plans, starting with the economy, “I will be the greatest jobs president that God ever created.” Ok that is done; he and God have this covered. Leaky borders and boundary law enforcement have nothing on this guy, as for the Donald, it’s easy; “I would build a great wall. And nobody builds walls better than me, believe me. And I’ll build them very inexpensively. I will build a great, great wall on our southern border and I’ll have Mexico pay for that wall.” He also has an immigration stance with regard to Mexico complete with ethnic slurs. We could lump this into foreign relations as well but, you be the judge, “When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending their best. They’re not sending you. They’re not sending you. They’re sending people that have lots of problems and they’re bringing those problems with us. They’re bringing drugs, they’re bringing crime, they’re rapists, and some, I assume, are good people.” Oh picture it; “Trumperica” will be a warm and welcoming place.

Sharing the Stage

Like it or not, The Donald will likely be on the GOP debate stage. Fox changed the parameters for eligibility for the debate on August 4, 2015. Candidates must place in the top 10 of an average of the five most recent national polls, as recognized by Fox News division. There is a real possibility of him making the cut, and I for one cannot wait to watch. Additionally, the imagery of the brash entrepreneur taking on the scripted well prepped candidates makes me giddy. Trump is a brawler and a scrapper. His presence and in-your-face style will upset political apple carts and who knows - rally a ready for a fight base, stranger things have happened.

This is a political gift to comedians and satirists everywhere. Like manna from heaven the Donald’s lines will just keep on drifting downward to be caught and redistributed for others to ponder and enjoy. And, we know how much he despises redistribution of anything. So, put your feet up, pop the popcorn, sit back relax and enjoy the show! But, remember it is not on Capital TV, as the General Assembly coverage has been replaced by a love story.

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