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Shopping Tips + Managing Kids’ Expectations For The Holidays

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

GoLocalProv Lifestyle Team

It's the most wonderful time of the year...right? On the contrary, it can be the most stressful—just ask the multitude of parents that engaging in toystore madness on Black Friday. All of that to make this the Christmas of their kids' dreams. The Consumer Electronics Association predicts 37% of Americans will be out there for the shopping holiday, and for those parents clinical psychologist and parenting coach Dr. Kate Roberts has some helpful holiday tips to get through the shoping frenzy and avoid disappointed faces on Christmas morning due to too-high expectations.

For more than twenty-five years, Dr. Kate Roberts has helped children and families navigate through the ever evolving world of relationships. As a licensed psychologist, family therapist, and couples counselor as well as a wife and mother of two, Dr. Kate offers a unique and highly qualified perspective in her practice, in the media and in her blogs on Psychology Today, Empowering Parents, and Nobullying.com.

Preparation on both ends

Both parents and children need to be realistic when it comes to the holidays, Dr. Robert advises. “Partners need to communicate up front and agree on the shopping plan both in terms of logistics and safety on Black Friday, or any holiday shopping...They should agree on budget and appropriate toys." Taking the kids along for the big day? Plan ahead for how to keep them by your side and safe from the crowds.

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Psychologist Dr. Kate Roberts

When it comes to gift giving, Dr. Roberts warns to start at an early age by teaching children there are limits. “Set realistic gift expectations, and before the holidays consider talking to your kids about their wish list,” she says. “Emphasize the joy of giving, spend time together instead of spending money, and take time to open each gift one at a time. Help your kids recognize how much they already have and encouraging them to give back to the community can also ease their expectations.”

Find more tips from Dr. Kate Roberts on Black Friday shopping and gift expectations below.

Black Friday shopping

Use a stroller or carriage whenever possible. This makes it easier to contain packages and your child.
Supervise your child at all times, including bathroom visits.
Have a safety talk with your child before you get to the mall.
Take your child into fitting rooms, even if you have to wait for oversized ones that will fit the entire family.
Plan to park far away from congestion. Tell your kids in advance of the plan and the safety rules in a busy lot.
Part of the safety talk should include not talking to strangers, even ones that are nice and seem friendly or just want to share holiday cheer. Strangers are not for talking to!
Remind them about basic etiquette, including pushing, shoving, running, and being mindful of store objects.
As much as they may not like it, try to make shopping a fun event by wearing bright colors—having your children wear bright colors will help easily identify them in case you get separated.
Tell them what to do in case they do get separated and where to go.
Be organized, have a plan, and keep the shopping time-limited.

Managing gift expectations

Plan to spend extra time, not just money, with your children as a gift during the holidays. Extra time will mean a lot more than extra presents.
Regardless of your income and discretionary money, parents need to limit gift giving during the holidays. Too many excess gifts detract from the real meaning of the holidays, which is appreciation for family, enjoying coming together, and gratefulness.
Teach children moderation. Have them make a list of priorities for what kind of gifts they want and pick one or two that you feel are reasonable and within your budget.
If you have a limited budget set expectations ahead of time. Make sure that your children understand that not every family is identical when it comes to income, and how much they can spend on the holidays.
If possible, try to avoid exposing your children to a lot of holiday shopping. Children really aren't shoppers by nature and it's tedious and difficult for them to behave well in that situation.
Regardless of advertising and other messages the kids receive, their main priority is being connected to their family. Parents don't have to worry that their children are going to be slighted if they have a strong connection and bond.
Children will appreciate parents making sacrifices in terms of gift giving although they might not be able to express it. Children can also be disappointed if they don't have all the gifts they requested, but can live with this disappointment if they recognize and validate it. Focusing on the connection between the parent and child is the most important thing.
Parents can think about big-ticket items that are specially priced on shopping holidays like Black Friday. These can serve as one big family present and they can get individual small presents for the children. This is one way to stay within the budget.

Related Slideshow: A Shopper’s Dream

Kittery Outlets

Kittery, ME

The Kittery Outlets in Kittery ME is a shopaholic’s paradise! Located only 1.5 hours from Worcester and 2 hours from Providence, so much is so close. Choose from great outlet stores—with great outlet prices—like Levi’s, Coach, Old Navy, LOFT and more. If you are looking for something more outdoorsy, be sure to check out the Kittery Trading Post, which carries outdoor apparel and equipment to please even the pickiest New Englander. Oh, and there’s a Lindt Chocolate Outlet store—enough said.

306 US Route 1, Kittery, Maine. 1 (888) KIT-TERY.

Church Street

Burlington, VT

Burlington is home to great universities, Lake Champlain and is the birthplace of Phish. But did you know that this Vermont city also has first class shopping? Church Street Marketplace, an outdoor shopping haven, is the center of the action. Perouse the cobblestone streets, featuring great shops like Urban Outfitters, Saratoga Olive Oil Company, Sweet Lady Jane, and more. If the weather doesn’t cooperate with outdoor shopping, pop into the Burlington Town Center Mall to check out the 802 Store—a place dedicated to everything Vermont.

Photo: AlexiusHoratius

Settler’s Green

North Conway, NH

North Conway, tucked away in the White Mountains of New Hampshire is the perfect weekend retreat. There are picturesque mountain views and some much needed peace and quiet. Shopaholics need not fear, though, because this little New England town has got their back. Settlers Green Outlet Village is chock full of all your brand name favorites, plus some specialty shops well worth taking a peek in. In total, there are over 60 shops! If you’re got a sweet tooth, be sure to stop into White Mountain Cupcakery—their cupcakes are the best around. Don’t forget, New Hampshire shopping is tax free!

Route 16, North Conway, NH. (603) 356-7031.

Photo: rickpilot_2000/flickr

Westfarms Mall

West Hartford, Connecticut

Located in West Hartford, Ct, Westfarms Mall is only about an hour’s drive from Worcester and a two hour drive from Providence. This elegant shopping mecca is stocked with designer names and delicious dining. Makeup lovers will appreciate the handmade cosmetics at Lush while fashinistas will fall in love with the styles at Anthropologie. Of course, it never hurts to look inside Tiffany & Co. either...

1500 New Britain Ave., West Hartford, Connecticut. (860) 561-3024.

Providence Place Mall

Providence, RI

Okay, so this one is super close to home—but it had to be included! The Providence Place Mall is a destination that people from all around travel to visit, so why not take advantage of it if it’s close by? This multi-level shopping mall is any fashionista’s dream come true! Banana Republic, the Apple Store, dELIA*S, and Nordstrom are some retail favorites; while The Cheesecake Factory is a top choice for a bite to eat.

1 Providence Place, Providence, RI. (401) 270-1000.

Yankee Candle Vlg. Store

South Deerfield, MA

Here’s another one that is close enough to home to make it a great day trip! Yankee Candle Village Store in South Deerfield is a kid at heart’s dream come true! This place is in the Christmas spirit 365 days a year, featuring keepsakes and ornaments alongside 400,000 of your favorite Yankee Candle scented candles. Head out on Nov. 16, 17, 23, or 24 to see Annie—everyone’s favorite musical; or on November 30 to see Santa arrive by helicopter!

25 Greenfield Road, South Deerfield, Ma. (877)636- 7707.

Manchester Outlets

Manchester, VT

Manchester, Vermont, is a vibrant community nestled in a beautiful Vermont setting. Besides its rich history and fabulous mountainside location, Manchester is also home to Manchester Designer Outlets. MDO features a unique blend of specialty and designer stores, such as Michael Kors, Polo Ralph Lauren and Armani Outlet, alongside first class entertainment and dining. If you are a shopaholic who loves the outdoors and long, scenic rides—but don’t want to give up the convenience of a one stop shopping mall, this is the place for you!

97 Depot Street, Manchester Center, VT. 1 (800) 955-SHOP.

Newbury Street

Boston, MA

Boston is the largest city in New England, so of course it has to have larger than life shopping. Enter Newbury Street, an urban shopping favorite. Newbury Street is made up of 8 blocks of marvelous shopping and dining. Whether you go to Boston’s fashion district to window shop or splurge, there is something for everyone. Crush Boutique, Rinascimento, and Bobbles and Lace are just a few of the shopaholic approved boutiques that call Newbury Street home.

Newbury Street, Boston.

Photo: Rudi Riet/flickr

The Umbrella Factory

Charlestown, RI

Picture a place where you can get a henna tattoo; visit a petting zoo; listen to live acoustic music; peruse or purchase goods from all around the world—all in one place. This is all possible at the Fantastic Umbrella Factory in Charlestown, RI. This cool outdoor shopping bazaar and has been delighting visitors since 1968. Six separate shops and a café each have their own unique twist, making a trip to The Fantastic Umbrella Factory anything but ordinary.

4820 Old Post Road, Charlestown, RI. (401) 364-1060.

Cape Cod

Massachusetts

The magic of the cape has been delighting artists and poets for centuries. Of course it is befitting that they have inspired shopping options as well. From the whimsical and free to the beautiful and dramatic; if you can dream it chances are it is on Cape Cod. Looking for sea glass jewelry, Cape Cod bracelets, or other great gift ideas? Check out Heart of Stone in Sandwich. For great art, take a peek in the Coastal Craft Gallery in Orleans. If something offbeat is more your style, Cape Kaleidoscopes in Mashpee is a do not miss!

For more on Cape Cod Shopping, visit http://www.capecodchamber.org/.

Photo: Cape Cod Travel Guide

L.L. Bean

Freeport, ME

L.L. Bean has long been the pinnacle of New England retailers. The company’s flagship store, which is located in Freeport, Maine, is a destination for all things outdoors. Visitors are greeted by a giant boot before they walk into the multi-level store. Inside, there is a plethora of men’s, women’s, and kids clothing and equipment that puts other sportswear shops to shame. If you decide to stay in the area, be sure to pop back into the store throughout the week for special clinics and courses. Oh, and don’t worry about closing time. This store is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.

95 Main Street, Freeport, Maine. (877) 755-2326.

Photo: Aude

Vermont Country Store

Weston, VT & Rockingham, VT

Sometimes there’s just nothing better than good old fashioned hospitality and great products. The Vermont Country Store, with locations in West and Rockingham, provides just that. The Orton family, who opened the first Vermont Country Store in Weston in 1946, are self proclaimed “Purveyors of the Practical and Hard to Find.” This store has got everything and anything that you can’t find anywhere else, from old-fashioned games and candy to high end, high quality wool apparel, to house wares and more. The Rockingham location is even complete with a covered bridge dubbed “The Kissing Bridge!”

657 Main Street, Weston, Vermont. (802) 824-3184.

1292 Rockingham Road, Rockingham, Vermont. (802) 463-2224.

Photo: appaloosa/flickr

Wesleyan Potters

Middletown, Connecticut

Do you love the feel and aesthetic of handmade pottery? If the answer is yes, Wesleyan Potters in Middletown, Connecticut, has got you covered. These guys have been the go-to specialists for pottery in New England since 1948. Take your pick of an assortment of beautiful crafts to give as gifts or keep for yourself. They are having a sale until December 15, so head over soon. They also offer tons of unique classes as well!

350 S Main Street, Middletown, Connecticut. (860) 344-0039.

Northeast Kingdom

Vermont

The Northeast Kingdom of Vermont is renowned for its striking views and world class winter sports opportunities. People flock here in the warmer months to bask in the sun; in the fall to take in the foliage; in the winter to fly to down the slopes. Why not come do all of that and more—plus get some shopping done? While you’re in the area, head to Stowe for upscale boutiques and specialty shops galore or head to Johnson for some warm country apparel at Johnson Woolen Mills. Designer shopping is located less than an hour away in the bustle of Burlington.

Bonus trip!

Fifth Avenue, NYC

No shopping getaway list could possibly be complete without 5th Avenue. Although this street is not located in New England, it is unrivaled for its shopping selection that is the epitome of upscale, elegant and classy. Where else in the world can you find Saks Fifth Avenue, Sephora, Louis Vuitton, Bulgari, Prada, and Apple all on one street?

Photo: St. Simon/Flickr

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