Modern Manners: Texting at the Table
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Are we seeking friendship in all the wrong places? The paradox is that the more connected we become to each other externally, the less connected we become internally and spiritually. Sadly, most of us use phones too often to avoid real life conversations.
PDAs are OK...
When dining alone or reviewing a restaurant for a blog. Or when you're in emergency mode as a doctor on-call or other professional dealing with life threatening situations; for instance, if you're on a shift at a suicide hotline, work in law enforcement, or you're an EMT. Otherwise, without a doubt, face-to-face conversation builds a stronger connection.
The two exceptions are a given to those with Celiac Disease and need to Web-search info about want they are about to order to eat and to those who absolutely have to fact check in order to quell a debate.
Worst offenders...
are those who are bored with the current conversation and check their email--which is tacky and, in my opinion, unsophisticated. Whatever is going on in the moment isn't good enough for them. You wonder, if everyone is texting, why are you there? If you do text, tell the person you are with who you are texting and why. Make it brief. No back 2 U text. If you're looking for where a particular movie is playing, it's OK. However, if the person you're with starts streaming texts, take that as a sign that she's bored and just not into you.
One of the worst scenarios I've heard recently was about the jealous former lover who texted her ex-boyfriend knowing full well that he was on a date with another woman. It set up a competition between the two women vying for his attention. The texter had the privacy advantage to go all out texting erotic and alluring messages, while the dinner companion was stuck holding her composure in restaurant mode. It was rude of the desperate ex-girlfriend, rude of the man, and silly of the new woman to put up with it. Needless to say, she didn't go out with him again.
