Job Corner: 2 Life Changing Communication Strategies You Need
Tuesday, April 07, 2015
A recent Global Workforce Leadership survey makes it clear employees and bosses agree on one thing. The skill that both say they need most in the workplace is – drum roll please - communication!
It’s not surprising. After all, our work is done largely through our relationships with other people. I mean, think about it, there’s very little you actually do that does not involve coordinating or aligning with others.
GET THE LATEST BREAKING NEWS HERE -- SIGN UP FOR GOLOCAL FREE DAILY EBLASTThat being said, the primary way in which you engage in relationship with others is through communication. Think about relationships that are going really well for you at work (and elsewhere). It’s likely you have a strong aptitude for communicating with that other person or group, and vice versa.
When you think about challenging relationships you might think about how “they don’t listen,” or “they never understand.”
So let’s look at three strategies for communication that will help you be a better communicator in your workplace.
1. The Improv Strategy: Say Yes, not But.
How many times have you been in a conversation, contributed an what you thought was a great idea, and heard someone say, “Great idea Chauncey, but…”
Poof. Guess that idea wasn’t so great after all. The “but” essentially negates anything that came before it.
In her book Bossypants, Tina Fey explains how the rules of improv are essential to humor. And to communication. In improv it’s not about being right or wrong, it’s about keeping the conversation going and responding to your partner in way that invites an exploration of the topic.
The technique for doing that is to always say, “yes, and….”. Using this approach (whether literally or metaphorically) acknowledges what your partner is saying. And, it helps you contribute to the conversation – by adding to the other person’s idea, or, contributing your own.
Here’s what it might sound like:
Before: Great idea Chauncey, but we can’t do it that way.
After: Great idea Chauncey. And, we have some complications if we do it that way. Let’s talk about those.
Can you feel how different those responses sound? Try it for yourself and let me know how it goes.
2. The Dragnet Strategy: Just the Facts, Man
I want to give you one of the most powerful sentences you will ever use in your communication with other people. Here it is:
“Is that a fact? Or is that a conclusion you’re drawing based on what you’ve observed.”
In all of my work with people, this is probably one of the questions I ask most frequently.
You have this amazing mind that’s built to process information very quickly and draw conclusions. Back in the caveman days this came in very hand when tigers roamed around, and Urk could quickly conclude he would be dinner if he didn’t make haste.
In the workplace, however, moving swiftly to conclusions often creates issues. Especially when it comes to other people.
Here are some things you might say when you need the Dragnet Strategy.
“My boss hates me, I’m sure she’s sorry she hired me.”
“She’s doesn’t care about this meeting, why did she even come here?”
“She’s terrible with customers and should be fired.”
Each of these statements draws on some behavior to come to a decision about intent. The reality is, you can never understand someone’s intent, unless they specifically and authentically tell you.
When you hear (or think) these kinds of statements, you can respond with: “Is that a fact? Or is that a conclusion you’re drawing based on what you’ve observed.”
Perhaps the boss is stressed out and doesn’t handle it well. Or that person just had a family crisis and is terribly distracted in the meeting. Or, perhaps one data point about customers (or only listening to one side) is informing your entire perception about someone’s performance.
Whether it’s you, or someone on your team, when you hear these assumptive statements, you can now stop people in their tracks and build conversations in the facts of the matter.
Try these 2 communication strategies this week.
Start today. Notice what happens and then drop me a line [email protected], and let me know what you learn.
Lea McLeod helps people meet challenges in the job search – and in the job - head on. Formerly a Director Level manager at Hewlett-Packard, she hired, fired and managed people around the world. Now, she helps people do great work, and leave the office on time.
She works with individuals and teams to make the work experience better, resolve conflict, and improve collaboration. Get started with her 21 Days To Peace At Work e-course. It’s free!
She also created The Resume Coloring Book online course to give clients a step-by-step process for writing a great resume, at a fraction of the cost a professional would charge.
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